I spend a lot of my life being a Mombie these days since my youngest daughter is apparently an insomniac. I could cope with her getting up through the night when she napped through the day, then I could at least have a little cat nap (shh don’t tell!) when she snoozed! But now she’s decided napping isn’t for her either! Seriously kid I can’t believe I produced you, sleep is like my favourite hobby!!! If i could cash in on all my refused childhood naps I’d do it in a heartbeat!!
It was a real struggle getting us out for the school run this morning with me functioning on caffeine alone! So when I got home I changed into my comfy, lounging around the house, clothes and got myself settled in for a lazy morning at home with the littlest bubba. Just as I was about to down my second coffee my phone rings and its the school. Sigh!!! Caitlin forgot her packed lunch so can I bring it down for her! Of course I’d love to get changed back into my normal, functioning adult, clothes and come back down to school with Caitlin’s packed lunch! So back we go down to school! Elle is hot and grumpy, as am I!
The next few hours are spent alternating between trying to get Elle to nap and listening to her crying because she’s so tired but won’t sleep! I believe I may have needed the toilet during this time but my bladder is trained to ignore such selfish needs as needing to pee! Plus I have a crying child attached to me which would make peeing virtually impossible! Not literally as many mums will know but virtually!
Elle eventually gives in and naps by lunchtime! Possibly out of pure boredom at being stuck with me all morning!
I have never been so happy for Caitlin to come home from school!! Caitlin is Elle’s favourite person in the whole world. Well maybe after her parents but only because we feed her!
Thank God for big sisters!!!!! Elle is happy to cuddle into her sister and watch completely age inappropriate TV about teenage spies having boyfriend issues, while I make our Dinner. Have I actually eaten yet today? I think I possibly ate some of Elle’s left over lunch and 4 chocolate biscuits. Oh and 12 cups of tea/coffee!!
Dinner meets both daughter’s approval which is a small victory! And despite my kitchen floor being coated in a layer of orange, I’ve achieved something today at least! Even if its only feeding these little monsters!
Elle is plunged straight in the bath after Dinner where she continually throws her wet facecloth out the bath onto the floor soaking me and the bathroom floor equally. Apparently this is hilarious if you are a one year old! Not so much when you’re the soggy 31 year old.
Next I begin battle preparations. Oops, I mean the bedtime routine! I’ve been thinking up new tactics all day and have decided instead of cbeebies before bed I will create a relaxing sensory environment in which to send my darling angel to the land of slumber, and give me an evening of child free peace!!
Predictably my efforts fail! Elle pulls the lamp down on herself and gets a toy wedged in her mouth which gives her Mother a mini heart attack!
I return to Iggle piggle and makka pakka with my tail between my legs! I have failed where only a blue man and a stone washing cave dweller can rescue me.
“Oh but who’s not in bed? . . . Iggle Piggles not in bed!”
Then suddenly it hits me!! That blue anarchist has been telling my daughter that he’ll only sleep in a bloody boat and not his bed!! Dammit Iggle Piggle!!
Its not that I’m DESPERATE for sleep or anything but where do you think I can I buy a little boat, no bigger than my hand?!
Thanks for reading!